During my quiet time this morning, I read the story of David and Abigail found in 1 Samuel 25. Basically, David and his men are roaming around the country fleeing from Saul. They find themselves amongst the shepherds of a man called Nabal. They deal well with these shepherds, protecting them and taking nothing from them. When they ask Nabal for food, he refuses. David suddenly kicks his men into high gear, amassing 400 of them, ready to go show Nabal who's boss. Nabal's wife, Abigail, a woman described as "intelligent and beautiful in appearance" (1 Samuel 25:3, NASB), hears about David's request and quickly loads up several donkeys with enough food to literally feed David's army. She meets David as he is coming to attack her foolish husband, persuades him not to take revenge into his own hands, and humbly offers the food she brought to David and his men. David relents, Nabal dies when he hears about it, and Abigail eventually becomes David's wife.
Ok, so you've probably heard that story at least once in Sunday School. And it teaches great lessons about wisdom and foolishness and trusting God to faithfully deal with the wicked and those who have wronged you, instead of taking matters into your own hands. But one thing that stuck out to me this morning was the very first interaction David and Abigail have. Although they are not yet married at this point, I think the lessons David and Abigail teach us in this story are extremely applicable to marriage.
Abigail: When she sees that David is about to take matters into his own hands and not leave vengeance to God, she humbly presents herself before him. She is not preachy or self-righteous. She even takes some of the blame onto herself (though she is blameless). She reminds David that God is going to be faithful to His promise to make him King of Israel and she encourages him that God is always taking care of him and preserving his life. She kindly and humbly steers David away from committing sin because she doesn't want to see him regret it later.
David: When confronted with Abigail's humble plea, David doesn't push her aside and continue on with his mission. He doesn't ignore her advice and encouragement or try to justify his intent. Rather, he blesses God for sending her to him, blesses her discernment, and blesses her for keeping him from committing sin.
What a wonderful example this is of the God-given responsibility a believing husband and wife have towards each other. And really, that all believers have towards each other. As you walk through your day, may you, like Abigail, examine yourself, gently and humbly restore one another, and bear each others' burdens (Galatians 6:1-2). And may you also, like David, receive correction well, let God handle those who wrong you, and trust Him continually to be faithful.
"Then David said to Abigail, "Blessed be the Lord God of Israel, who sent you this day to meet me, and blessed be your discernment, and blessed be you, who have kept me this day from bloodshed and from avenging myself by my own hand.""
1 Samuel 25:32-33, NASB
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